[fOr BLooD aNd FoR CHARity]

(July 4th)
GIRL PROBLEMS: are mostly nonexistant now.. I just.... ended it all I guess.... Sabrina doesn't talk to me anymore, Sydni understands that we are over, Carrissa doesn't much talk to me anymore, and Erica I think there is no problem.... maybe? I'll find out after the fireworks when I come back to my house/a computer so that I can format this goddamn thing....

(July 8th)
I've realized how much it sucks to do basically nothing for days, it feels... GAH... I don't like it... I think I am going to just draw all over myself and everything in my room... and write and scream and sing and sleep... and.... I don't even know

you know, I've realized it sure does seem like you're ditching someone when you make no attempts to contact them for days on end after leaving them suddenly without warning... neat, huh?

I've hung out with my brother a few of these days though... he tells me that we are similar... that we are similar... SIMILAR... I guess you could say that, if by similar you meant different passed explanation then yeah, we spent around 8 years under the same roof then he left then I left then he came back and I don't plan on that, I don't like being home, wherever home is for now. If HOME is where my parents are, my parents that I can't go more than a few simple hours without almost being brought to tears by their desperate attempts to argue over something small and senseless, haha yeah, home.

I have just been sitting here... waking up even later day by day doing nothing except small exercises and videogames... how do people live like this? not to judge but damn... giving you the benefit of the doubt you are morally stronger than me I guess, I can't do it.... I NEED to do things... and I am going to..... tomorrow... for now I think I will finish my run on Need For Speed: Most Wanted, draw a picture... eat some taqitos and look for a way out of this god forsaken house